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Thread: The Real Struggle

  1. #1
    You've Earned a Custom Title!
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    The Real Struggle

    http://www.rapbattles.com/forum/sho...694#post3782694
    http://www.rapbattles.com/forum/sho...712#post3782712

    “All rise” is what I’m hearing,
    Custody case again yo,
    Feeling like all my life is done,
    All I’m trying to do is get back my daughter and son,
    Tryna make it through the world again,
    Trying to do ma thing,
    Crying faces man I’m tryna console my friends,
    Cos they all feel my pain, they all feel my strain,
    But I don’t show no emotions no no,
    Cos then they’d say that I am weak, that I am bleak
    The king showing tears no that’s not me,
    A feel so dirty u see, but am meant to be clean,
    The gutter aint the place for me,
    I need to get back to the top man,
    Need to get back my throne man,
    A king in my own land,
    Need to see what I own man,
    But at the moment I just aint got the motivation,
    Just no heart and none of that patience,
    Snapping at every little thing in my face and,
    Pushing everybody away again man,

    Hook: x2
    All I need is to be alone, give me a day or so,
    Need to recuperate, try and find my way home,
    I’m in pieces, need to become whole again,
    Walk up tall amongst the other men.

    Verse 2, all by myself now,
    Everybody gone, aint nobody around,
    Jus me in my home, phone ringing constantly,
    But I just leave it to the machine,
    So nobody can bother me,
    Sometimes I just feel like Constantine,
    Between different worlds,
    Between different girls,
    Living the wrong life, will I ever learn?
    Don’t really think I will, so why am I concerned?
    Got no people near me, I’ll end up hurting myself,
    Drinking the bottle dry, I’ll end up hurting my health,
    It’s hard hitting to you, Life of a depressed male,
    Behind these lyrical bars, in my own jail,
    So I must break free, must get free,
    Must be set free, if only god just let me,

    Hook (x2)

    I guess this is my struggle,
    Life as my hustle,
    Living like this everyday,
    Acting up like this shit was a play,
    Tryna make my way through all the shit,
    Heart break and broken promises,

    The games not to be played unless you’ve read the rules,
    Or just do as I did, and be made a fool,
    But they can never keep a good man down,
    We all unite and fight, and then we break the wall down,
    That barrier keeping us away from greener fields,
    But when you make it on the real,
    Life feels great, there’s nothing else left,
    No need for the death,
    So if you can relate just sing along,
    If you relate to the words in my song,

    Hook (x2)
    I'm So ILL I'm Terminal!

    Vote On My Battles


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    Leave Feed On My Om's

  2. #2
    You've Earned a Custom Title! tjbthakilla's Avatar
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    you was good

    7/10 aight best i can do

    you need to stay up on this site keep posting

    it will make your flows better

    catch ya later

  3. #3
    .:Sinner:.
    Guest
    Nice work.
    Nice flow
    Nice structre
    Nice wordplay
    Nice drop.
    Keep it up.

  4. #4
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    thanks more feed plz, uppin!!!
    I'm So ILL I'm Terminal!

    Vote On My Battles


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  5. #5
    You've Earned a Custom Title!
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    uppity up
    I'm So ILL I'm Terminal!

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  6. #6
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    come on ppl
    I'm So ILL I'm Terminal!

    Vote On My Battles


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  7. #7
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    It Was Iight
    Vocab Was Iight
    So Was The Wordplay
    Could Elevate In Those Subjects Tho
    Flow And Structure Was Iight
    Kinda Long
    What I Didnt Like Was How The Lines Were Short
    U Should Prolly Make Them Longer
    Make It Into An Audio It Mite Sound Dope
    Last edited by SyCo_187; January 12th, 2006 at 06:11 PM

  8. #8
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    cheers

    uppin for sum more feed
    I'm So ILL I'm Terminal!

    Vote On My Battles


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  9. #9
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    Please Leave Feed On This Piece For Me =]
    http://www.rapbattles.com/forum/showthread.php?t=264373
    .

  10. #10
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    uppppppp^^^^^^
    I'm So ILL I'm Terminal!

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  11. #11
    old york
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    Ok,well your lyrics or om for this wasnt good.No offence not even decent.But i see your trying to elevate.Lyrics arent really a style for an open mic,read other peoples like Nostromadous and you'll see that it's kinda completely different.An open mic is more like poetry than with the lyrics you can mix it up for the storyline.Yours was pretty decent,but not as what i expect from other beginnners.


    Please check out: Different Direction.
    hurterrybody.

  12. #12
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    upppp
    I'm So ILL I'm Terminal!

    Vote On My Battles


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  13. #13
    You've Earned a Custom Title! Little Voices's Avatar
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    likin it, loved the way you've described ya ffeelin's and such....
    flow came fluently and ya had a decent structure....
    Imagery was there adn wordplay was ight....
    nice piece...
    stay at it....

    peace
    Little Voices

    Battles won :

    (5-0)
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    (5-1)
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    Battles lost :

    (4-5)
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    __________________________________________
    OPEN MIC

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  14. #14
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    yo... Nice drop....flow was on point great structure... yeah u got it

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