TQ has arrived

[-TramaQueen-]

-jus introducin myself in poetix-

In my mindz eye
I'm tha apple pie
you just tha fly
anutha parasite
g'head take a bite
that's yer invite
silly maggot
you can't take it
go on N fake it
cuz game recognize game
you recognized for bein lame
know you're guilty so you plead insane
N that'z tru too
fucken GLAD I'm notchoo
can't imagine that nasty ass shoe
In fact I think it'z time you flew
shoo fly don't bother me
steady tryin ta take my place constantly
I guess you haven't heard that there's no stoppin me

[Quik-$pit]

Aight first of all welcome to RB!!!

Nice lil poem you did here, a lil lacking in energy but still some good emotion in there!!!

Drop some feedback on this poem i did ... but remember it a serious poem an i dont want people sayin stuff like nice wordplay an good flow ... its there for people to try an give me advice if ya get what i mean ..

heres the link > Drowning in my own tears

[-TramaQueen-]

I read that on tha other thread but I can't figure this out! -L- I'm tryin gimme a minute N thenx fer tha feedback

p.s drownin in my own tearz it TITE AS FUCK

[phoenix808]

The rhyme shceme was good, i haven't really seen the line rhyme's in a while, there was a definite flow in this piece, and it was good, keep it up
peace

[Sincere™]

^^^^^^^Impressive for yo 1st drop am suprised....ma

Nice shit Nice contend Flow wus sick

Poeticness felt Nice

U peeped mine

SIN OF A MAN poetry section

AND

http://www.rapbattles.com/forum/show...threadid=63738

^^^MY OPEN MIC RAP OR REAP

[Varentao]

Though simple in it's ryhme scene and how it reads. The simplicity is covering depth that impressed me.

Not so sure what it's about fully. Something to do with someone trying to play you. Then force themselves on you. Along those lines..

But yeah, though i felt at times it tailed off into akwardness. Overall, a good piece.

..resp...