Hieroglyphics

[neon blitz]

Hieroglyphics

Ill take you back to the days of Tutankhamen
Slavery ruled, they didn’t refute the bad men
People thing Egypt, and think sand n castles
But don’t realise they were treated like land n cattle
Ruled by rule and a man in chapel
Men are men and should float free
90’000 couldn’t because of thutmose three
Would those be slaves or servants?
Or a rich kings idea of his sons inheritance
No use for the weak just minus these
Put the strong in some families dynasty
For these timeless seeds of the ancient world
Remain in signs of life now in the faintest pearl
Why did you king seen nothing in what servants did to please ya?
Lifting blocks bigger than my rocks building the pyramids of Giza
I’m sick of rappers trying to bore us wit their sets
I’d rather listen to stories of Horus semerkhet
Coz ive got a gift to spit truth like hieroglyphics
It’s seen right here, believe my biros mystic
King is ka, ka being the given title
Listen real close cause this wisdoms vital
Can we really find what are truths is
Maybe it’s hidden along with scrolls imprinted on cartouches
This is real, im not and aimless fraud
Like the 1st kings of Egypt ill become a famous god
A god of culture, the urban type
As long as I plan the insurgence right
Coz telling these stories is urgent right?
Na these guys have passed on millenniums ago
And are happy that now many sing their flows

[neon blitz]

http://www.rapbattles.com/forum/show....html?t=406089
http://www.rapbattles.com/forum/show....html?t=406089

[Well Versed]

lol mayn u used so many words i got no clue what u were talkin bout...but im diggin tha concept of talkin bout Egyptian shyt...flow was great n i thought ur wordin was pretty good...ur vocab was crazy cuz u flowed so many Egyptian things..ur metaphorz n ur imagery was pretty great n u also seem to have some knowledge bout tha history of Egypt so i think i might have even learned some shyt...anyway it was FUN TO READ...KEEP WRITING THAT GOOD SHYT HOMIE n STAY UP!!!

yo RTF on any of my drops....new ones coming soon!

[Joe M]

Interesting topic.
structure was alot better than the open mic. easier to follow.
flow was dope, easy to go with it.
multi's were good, not as good as ya last one but this was a topical.
metas were good too and ya got a strong vocab.
overall: another good piece man. keep it up

[neon blitz]

http://www.rapbattles.com/forum/show....html?t=406089
http://www.rapbattles.com/forum/show....html?t=406089

uppz n away

[Spoken Deity]

this lacked any real intelligene or wit... Its really simply and has little interesting things to bring the reader in. Work on vocab, structure, concepts, and imagery...pretty much the basics of poetry.
Keep at it though

[neon blitz]

ahh yeah....upz

[Chris Boer|]

Didn't get this? I wasn't fond of the delivery and topic of the piece/ You could have cuts lots of extra stuff out that over crowded your work.
Didn't really think the piece lefted off to be honest, it was a little stale and the message was blurry.

[Dreamer22]

Damn. These rhymes were fire far as the whole egyptian story it was a little off base with the rhyme schemes n didn't fit very well

I’m sick of rappers trying to bore us wit their sets
I’d rather listen to stories of Horus semerkhet

Nice bar. It shows shows Horus Semerkhet, which i believe to be the first ruler of egypt, nice, but i don't think it did much contribution to the egyptian story plus hating rappers in the mid is off base, no hate.

Though overall, also since it's in the poetry section, putting rhymes in a poetic story type piece isn't an easy thing to do, so props. nice drop

[Alta]

this was ok it seemed yu was rambling an yu had low and high poiints it seemed yu put 30% of feeling in this but its ok keep elevating

[neon blitz]

yea this was a pretty old piece, i reckon i could make this alot better if i re-wrote it and stuck to the concept more ridggidly