"Bonsoir, monsieur, avez-vous décidé?"
"Non, désolé, je suis juste ici pour le spectacle..."
I waited with my glass of champagne as the waiter walked away,
spent the last several days clinging onto memories and raw pain.
I thought I was strong, strange how a woman can prove us wrong,
what I thought was love tasted like blood -- or bourbon on the rocks.
I remember the first time I felt those vibes; sipping a freshly brewed latte,
hearing her on the radio made me so high -- "gone to find her big blue jay."
I couldn't believe the way she sings, like every word flowed in my veins,
it became a curse, or maybe a dream, as she tattooed lyrics to my brain.
A miraculous change to my mood... I would never be the same,
like my DNA was rewritten by her truth, I needed to see her play.
That year for Christmas, it was my only wish to watch my muse perform,
and despite a storm, I went to a gig where she bloomed evermore.
The way she played guitar... the way her vocals painted the room...
tears flooded my eyes as I was hypnotized, serenaded and swooned.
The shame in her blues, the joy in her Jazz, consumed with every rift,
I noticed the bottle fading fast... but I drew closer to her cherry lips.
Imagining a married kiss, she had me in a trance, an unstoppable slow dance,
so there I stood, a fool, thinking up stories about an impossible romance.
My heart drifted into her hands, and it was like the Earth moved below,
"Take a token, of my love, I see you through the smoke..."
"We only said goodbye with words, I died a hundred times,"
man, that line has never touched a soul quite like mine.
The first time I snorted a line, every time I've lost my path,
both times I've crossed to the other side she brought me back.
At the bottom of every slur, I found myself with a reason to live,
but then she'd become weak enough for her demons to win.
When they found Amy, I hoped that before her flame seized,
that maybe she'd found the same peace her music gave me.
"And I'll battle 'til this bitter finale,
just me, my dignity and this guitar case."
*Italic lines by Amy Winehouse*